Just Another Day

Only Zion T on heavy replay is going to get me through the next 2 days.

As most of you know, I have been in South Korea for the past few months. I was accepted into the TALK program. Overall, it’s great! For teaching English in a public school, I get to live and experience South Korea.

Then there are the days like today. Day one (of 3) of our culture trip. I’m in a pretty swanky hotel room, showered and ready for bed. But there is a curfew that I have to stay up for, so I decided to share my feelings with you all before studying for a bit. The hardest part about being here in South Korea is all the mandatory social interaction. From having dinner and scheduled fun times with my co-workers to these culture trips with the TALK program, I struggle to get through them.

Yes, I knew that these would be things that I would have to comply with while overseas.

Yes, I have been asked to do more strenuous and demanding work in my previous jobs.

Though for someone like me, who enjoys exploring solo and takes things in differently, this is difficult (AF). In the beginning it starts off okay – seeing and saying hello to everyone. Catching up on missed small talk and the commute from one location to the next. Then after 2 or 3 hours of listening to over 2 dozen folks talking and laughing on loop begins to wreck my nerves and I’m looking for an exit.

It is exhausting! And I need to recharge – stat. I try not to let it show by smiling when folks address me or by getting out of site, but it doesn’t always work. So I nap, listen to music, study, or find inspiration to write about to pass the time. Well, tonight I did a combo of 3 of these and it wasn’t enough. And I almost snapped at the girls I had the misfortune of dining with too.

Handling my emotional state is enough, so once they started in (and never quit) about how they didn’t like the food, I knew it was time to go! I ended up wolfing down my seafood dish with some rice and bolted out of the restaurant into the welcoming cold.

I say all this because my post lately have all been about my amazingly positive and wonderful thoughts about being in South Korea. As they should be, because for the most part – being here has been amazingly positive! I’m slowly gaining confidence in my Korean, learning the ropes as far as how to best teach my students, and I feel like my health has improved too from the lifestyle changes of having a BMW (that’s a bus, metro, walking for those of you out of the loop).

The holidays are rapidly approaching and it is my least favorite time of the year. And just as I did today, I will make it through them as best as I can. Because today may not have been the best, but that doesn’t mean that I should forget all the beautiful days that I had before it. Or go into the future with whatever negative vibes that I have about how today was for me. It’s just another day, and if I allow it to it can ruin my experience while overseas.

And I went through too much to get where I am now to let that happen.

I’ll be sure to try my best to post once more this month. Thank you so much for making it through this surprisingly long post.

As always, be inspiring and stay inspired Musings!

– Soprano Musings

 

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Wishfully Waiting

First, allow me to properly thank Dan Aragón for making this photo available for free on @unsplash. It captures my current mood so well as I listen to LoFi Hip Hop radio via Youtube at the moment.

Now I can begin my update from my post last month.

My documents for the teaching internship program that I applied for were, in fact, received by the GA consulate. All is not lost but instead completed. At least on my end 🙂

I have completed my initial and final interviews for the internship, and am now waiting to hear back from the head office overseas in regards to whether or not I was accepted. On or before June 1st I should know the outcome. How am I keeping myself busy until then?

  • Catching up on my blogs.
  • Working as many hours as I can at both of my jobs.
  • Spending time with my friends.
  • Going to the beach.
  • Creating a new vlog playlist on my YouTube channel.

The light at the end of the tunnel can almost be seen! I just hope it leads me to the sunny, magical, and beautiful side where my hopes and dreams can take flight.

As always, be inspired and stay inspiring musings!

– Soprano Musings

Melancholy Eve

Currently at my seasonal gig until 9pm, and this overwhelming feeling of pending sadness has turned my already tired mood into something so foul that I can hardly stand it.

I applied for an internship for a teaching program in South Korea a few weeks ago.

Tomorrow is the final day of processing submitted documents for the applicants for that program, and I feel as though my credentials just weren’t enough to make it to the interview stage. And now I honestly don’t know what there is left for me to do. Sigh.

Even worse, I keep imaging what would have happened next and came to realize something that I wasn’t aware of – no matter where I go, my conditioning to not fully letting others in, to keeping folks at arm’s length at all times, to really allowing myself to soak in those beautiful moments called life to someone else – will always be there.

So even if I did (do) get to the interview stage of this program, on a plane to SK, go through training, and am afforded the opportunity to teach in a place that I have come to love many years ago, will I be able to fully appreciate it all? Will these feelings and mentality of mine only become more heighten? This is how I feel everyday in the city I was born and raised as it is, around friends that I have know for years. How would I weather all of that and then some then? Especially with the cultural and language barriers?

Having shared all this, I still want the chance to find out. And I still feel that I would (will) do well with this internship. So I am going to press on and remain positively hopeful that I will get a response from the Consulate in GA about an interview.

I don’t think luck will help me too much, so instead I will ask for more patience and plenty of clarity. As well as peace, no matter the outcome.

Be inspired. Stay inspiring.

– Soprano Musings